Setting Boundaries God’s Way: Overcoming Guilt and Embracing Spiritual Freedom

Discover how to set Christ-centered boundaries, overcome false guilt, and find true spiritual freedom in toxic relationships.

8/28/20252 min read

a cross in the middle of a bright field
a cross in the middle of a bright field

Does setting boundaries make you feel guilty, selfish, or unspiritual? In Chapter 7 of Daniel B. Lancaster’s Satan: The Liar, Narcissist, and Troubling Christian Relationships, we learn that godly boundaries are essential—not only for emotional health, but for spiritual victory. The enemy loves to twist the concept of boundaries, but Jesus invites us into relationships marked by freedom, clarity, and love.

Godly Boundaries Are Not Selfish

Many Christians struggle with the idea that saying “no” is unloving or un-Christlike. But boundaries are not walls to keep people out—they’re fences that protect what God has entrusted to you: your time, your heart, your purpose. Even Jesus withdrew from crowds, rested, and said “no” to manipulative demands.

The enemy wants you to believe that true love means sacrificing yourself to the point of exhaustion or harm. That’s not God’s design. Healthy boundaries honor God, value others, and reflect Christ’s balance of compassion and truth.

The Enemy’s Guilt Trip

Satan uses false guilt to keep believers trapped in unhealthy patterns. You might hear:

  • “If you really loved them, you’d do more.”

  • “A good Christian never says no.”

  • “You’re abandoning your calling.”


These lies breed resentment, burnout, and spiritual confusion. But God’s conviction leads to freedom, not shame. If a “guilt trip” pushes you away from joy, peace, or truth, it’s not from God.

How to Set Boundaries Like Jesus
  1. Clarify Your Priorities: Ask God what He is calling you to steward—your family, your health, your faith.

  2. Communicate with Grace: Be honest and gentle. “I’m unable to help with that right now,” is a complete sentence.

  3. Expect Pushback: Those who benefit from your lack of boundaries may resist your new strength. Stand firm in Christ.

  4. Rest in God’s Approval: Your worth isn’t measured by people’s reactions but by God’s love for you.


Freedom Awaits

Jesus came to bring freedom, not fear. Boundaries allow you to say “yes” to God’s best and “no” to what drains your spirit. In Christ, you can walk confidently, knowing your healthy limits are a reflection of His wisdom and care.

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