Getting Through the First Year of Grief: Grace for Every Season

The first year of grief is the hardest. Find biblical comfort and practical steps for surviving holidays, anniversaries, and every difficult “first” with Jesus.

8/26/20251 min read

a woman holding a candle in front of a window
a woman holding a candle in front of a window

The first year after losing someone you love can feel endless—a series of painful “firsts” that take your breath away. In Chapter 6 of “Death is a Liar,” Daniel B. Lancaster shares gentle wisdom for surviving this hardest season of grief, offering hope that you truly are not alone.

Why Is the First Year So Hard?

Every milestone—a birthday, anniversary, holiday, or simple routine—reminds you of the one you’ve lost. The world expects you to “move on,” but your heart is still catching up to this new reality. Lancaster reminds us: grief is not linear, and there’s no set timeline for healing. God’s grace covers every step—even when you feel stuck.

Facing the Difficult “Firsts”

The hardest days are often the ones everyone else forgets. Lancaster encourages us to anticipate these triggers, not avoid them. Sometimes, just naming your anxiety about an upcoming holiday or anniversary can give you space to grieve honestly and ask for support.

Practical Steps for the First Year
  1. Mark important dates on your calendar. Prepare emotionally for birthdays, holidays, and other significant “firsts.”

  2. Create small, meaningful rituals. Light a candle, visit a favorite spot, or write a letter to your loved one—simple ways to honor your grief.

  3. Let yourself rest. Fatigue, brain fog, and unpredictable emotions are normal in grief’s first year.

  4. Ask for help. Reach out to friends, church family, or a support group before big days arrive.

  5. Lean on Jesus, day by day. You may not feel His presence every moment, but He promises to carry you through.


Grace, Not Perfection

There’s no “right” way to grieve your first year. Lancaster’s story reminds us: God’s compassion is steady, even when our emotions are not. Be gentle with yourself. Let every tear become a silent prayer.

You will make it through. And when the calendar turns, you’ll see that Jesus has been walking with you all along—faithful in every season.

Get your copy of “Death is a Liar” on Amazon for just $2.99:
https://www.amazon.com/Death-Liar-through-Comfort-Christian-ebook/dp/B09QBTCXGV